1. Be open to change
The first step in the process of making a big change in life is you have to accept that change is possible for you. I have found that when I am faced with a big change in life my first reaction is avoidance and denial. (see the cartoon above) This is the brains go to choice when someone (like you) wants to make a change.
What is interesting is that you wouldn’t be denying you need to change if you didn’t somehow think that change was what you needed to do! If you really didn’t want anything to change, you would not have even thought of it. So the truth is you do want some sort of tolerable change.
So the first challenge in this process is to change your thinking. Take a deep breath and accept that something needs to change!
Affirmation: I realize I need to change and I am looking for a winning solution.
An interesting sidebar is that taking a deep breath does actually do something. When your body is in fight or flight, you tense up and breathing can get shallow. Stress activates the sympathetic nervous system. Deep breathing increases the supply of oxygen to your brain and stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system, which promotes a state of calmness. This is why (before important stuff like meditation, prayer, yoga) they ask you to breathe deep. So take those deep breaths!
2. Do the research
Fear of the unknown is the big one. Once you realize that you need to make a change, the EGO wants to know how! If you don’t know how, then change won’t happen!
I have found in my life that when I reduce the unknowns, I am more open to change.
The way to reduce the unknowns is to do the research. When I grew up that normally meant going to the library. Now you just need to reach for your smart phone. Like the library of Alexandria, your phone has all the answers. We have a term for it: Google!
So sit down and start to find out what that new career might require for a resume. Look up relationships on the internet and find out how to connect to that special somebody. Google a new diet to help with your health. Check out TripAdvisor and find a cruise to take!
When I was young, I really wanted to have a career as a pilot. I spent years in the library with book and magazines figuring out just what paths were available and which I might take. One of them actually worked for me!
3. Make the decision
You know this is coming. You will never be able to do enough research to know what will happen in the future. That is not the goal of the research. You need some options and you need to calm the EGO enough so your intuition can be heard.
You should have a list of options available to you after a little research. That is all you need.
Look at your list and close your eyes. Imagine each item has a light shining on it. Of all the options, which has the brightest light? If you are more analytical, close your eyes and rate them on a 5 point scale with 5 being “I love it” and 1 being “not a chance”. Both methods allow your intuition to be heard. Find the answer with the most draw or electricity and then do that. Put it on your calendar and do it!
Your intuition is a really good tool to listen to. You know in your heart what is a good option for you. Listen to it.
The EGO is not your friend at this point. Logic and reason are used in research but your heart needs to pick the direction. If you pick from your heart, you whole body and soul will move a mountain to make change happen. If you let somebody talk you into a choice, you will not have the strength to go on or you will miss a huge opportunity because someone else’s fear guided you.
So make a choice and stick to it. If you have made a choice from your heart, you will be able to handle the naysayers that will challenge every decision you make. Hang on and go for it.